Legalism/Sympathy

What is legalism?

When I hear that word, I think of the Pharisees. They knew scripture better than anyone else, but they used that knowledge to glorify themselves. But I feel like Christians now who are stuck in legalism really aren't like that, at least most. Sure you have your self-righteous, brother condemning type, but you also have those who do good because they believe it to be moral and correct, and they do good out of obedience. I once said in discussion group that obedience out of legalism and obedience out of love will look exactly the same, but the difference is in the heart.

What does it mean to obey out of love then?

To me, legalism is outlined pretty well in 1 Corinthians 13, the Love chapter. It is funny how the other day I saw a picture (seemingly) of two people dating and being intimate with each other, with this passage in the caption. I would say the verse is taken out of context but still applies, albeit I would also say those two do not know love yet as it takes years to cultivate. Anyways in 1 Corinthians 12 Paul outlines an exhaustive list of Spiritual Gifts and how we are to use them for the common good and for the Body. But then in 1 Corinthians 13 Paul adds that if we use these gifts, examples like tongues (v1) and prophecy (v2), or if we were to die as a martyr (v3) or give everything to the poor (v3), but we do not do them out of love, then they become legalistic and useless. Paul then lists out the attributes of love, where if you replace every instance of the word Love with God, it all makes sense. The only purpose of Spiritual Gifts is to use them for the sake of others (John Piper). That is how doing good works out of love looks like.

Lately I've been struggling with this at CMU's ACF. I have a lot of knowledge I can share, and experiences I can draw upon to help those here in their struggles or finding direction. But I can't help but feel slightly prideful as well, and realize also that my experiences are my own and the way I teach doesn't resonate with everyone's version of the gospel (who God means to them, how they interact with the gospel, their own personal experiences with faith). I truly believe that if I love my brothers and sisters, I must tell them the truth. But the opposite is also true: Truth must be spoken in love. These two are forever intertwined in scripture (1 Corinthians 13:6, Ephesians 4:15, 2 Thessalonians 2:10, 1 Peter 1:22, 1 John 3:18). If I try to speak the truth to my brothers and sisters but I don't do it out of love, with pride or self-righteousness or without gentleness and caring, then I will have accomplished nothing and sinned against them. All in all, I just want to help people in God's timing, and always have the spirit of vulnerability and gentleness, and be willing to listen to people share about their brokenness. I also want to be able to share about my past sufferings as well, and boast about how God and God alone helped me overcome it all. And if I cannot do any of that, at least I can pray and give up control of my life and my influence in people's lives up to God, who is in control of everything. An older brother (in his 40's) in my mens group shared to me that he believes God gave him all his struggles and trials to teach him one thing, to be able to sympathize with those struggling now. I want to be able to do that.

Please, please, please do not rebuke your friend with self-satisfying relish.  No one should ever enjoy rebuking a friend.  There will be a shaking voice, tears in your eyes, trembling hands, a sincere conviction, and a heart dripping with gracious love.  You won’t expect them to listen to you, but to listen to the truth.  Anything else is just your flesh trying to prove a point.  Then you need to go back to the lab in prayer to wrestle that flesh into the ground.  You don’t ever rebuke to prove something.  You rebuke to help your friend away from the edge of death. - J.S. Park