Futility of sermons (question mark)

Today while walking to seminar I realized that I don't really remember that many sermons. I barely remember any ones from PCC, except of the the latest few from Ecclesiastes and Psalms, and looking into the past I also barely remember any.

I think I remember 1 from The Cause (that I've downloaded and saved) and relationships (how not to date a non-believer). That and also the sermon at the beginning of the year marking the direction of where The Cause church is going in Kansas City (Jesus Runs This Town).

I only remember one sermon from GPC where Dr. Calhoun gave a sermon about Jesus as Lord, based in one of the epistles. I can't remember a single sermon after the church became Crossroads (sorry Pastor Dan). This was the church I found the closest community and the most friendships. In the end of my college career, I think people (especially those who were of the same grade) helped me keep my sanity and faith in God. I could have been completely destroyed, or my recovery process would have taken much longer, if God hadn't led me to them.

From The Journey, I only remember the one about community and the Love Lies series, and one of the sermons where Pastor Darrin gave his testimony. Ah and also the one about child-like faith vs blind faith. To be honest, this was the church that I felt the least community in but the most teaching (due to it being basically a Reformed church even though its listed as non-denominational).

I don't remember any sermon from New City Fellowship. I just remember the black preacher always talking about Jesus and the Gospel, almost the exact same message every week with lots of "amens" and "hallelujahs". Not saying it's bad, we ought to be preached the Gospel every week and focus on Jesus every moment of our lives, but it makes it so you zone out if you are the type of person who wants substance in his/her sermons. Yet this was the church I learned most to be missional and applying the Cross and the Gospel to my life. It was eye opening, to see people from all nations coming together and praise the Lord. It was the most honest and raw in its sharing, and by far the one church I've been to in my life that strives to give back to the community around it.

For the 18 years I've been to GKCCCC, I don't remember a single sermon. Not one. So much for growing up in the church if I can't even remember anything. But it did lay the foundation of the basics. In Sunday School I learned the verses of assurance, Sermon on the Mount, and various psalms. Even younger I learned the stories of the OT and also Paul's travels and Jesus's teachings and miracles. I learned that there can be persecution within the church, the brokenness and selfishness of others, and that even when all is almost lost there can be hope. It was also here that started my idolatrous desire for a community tailored to me.