I don't know the science about myself. I don't know my body
works, with all its feelings, emotions, urges, and instincts. I don't know why I
enjoy the things I enjoy, like the things I like, and have addictions uniquely to
me. I don't know why I get depressed, or how the shaping of my hypothalamus plays
a part in it.
I don't know why I hold on so dearly to the memories I
contain. I don't know how "memory engrams " or "LTP" or
even "prion-like proteins" determine the memories of my family, of my
friends, or even the memory that I know God. I don't know when I should forget
them, or when to remember them, or if they have any significance at all.
I don't know people. I don't know what they are thinking, or
where they have come from. I don't know the experiences they've had, the
environment they grew up in, or how friends or family have influenced them. I
don't know how much suffering they have endured, or how much hatred has been
fired their way. I don't know who God is to them, and where God is leading
them. I don't know their future.
I don't know how to help people. I don't know when to speak
up or to be silent. I don't know when to embrace or give space. I don't know
what words they want to hear or need to hear. I don't know how to cure their
pain or heal their wounds. I don't know how to be a friend who cares.
I don't know love. Oh I thought I knew when I was younger; how romance worked and how I should prepare for marriage. But the older I got, the more I realized how much I really didn't know. I realized how little I know about God, or that He is Love (1 John 4:16). In the words of King David, "Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain (Psalm 139:6)." He is expressing his awe of God's sovereignty, of God's omniscience (v1-6), of God's omnipresence (v7-12), and of God the personal designer (v13-18). I think I know who God is in my head, but it's going to take a lifetime to know it in my heart. When I talk to old couples, they will tell me that they have realized the love they have, cupped between mutually wrinkled hands, is only a drop in the vastness of the ocean that is God. I am just a person who understands 1% of love (not even), and my entire life's goal is to make it to 2%. I don't know the happiness I will have when I stand before the Lord and know the fullness of His Love for me.
I don't know love. Oh I thought I knew when I was younger; how romance worked and how I should prepare for marriage. But the older I got, the more I realized how much I really didn't know. I realized how little I know about God, or that He is Love (1 John 4:16). In the words of King David, "Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain (Psalm 139:6)." He is expressing his awe of God's sovereignty, of God's omniscience (v1-6), of God's omnipresence (v7-12), and of God the personal designer (v13-18). I think I know who God is in my head, but it's going to take a lifetime to know it in my heart. When I talk to old couples, they will tell me that they have realized the love they have, cupped between mutually wrinkled hands, is only a drop in the vastness of the ocean that is God. I am just a person who understands 1% of love (not even), and my entire life's goal is to make it to 2%. I don't know the happiness I will have when I stand before the Lord and know the fullness of His Love for me.
(Title inspiration from Rae of Sun)
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