There is always a wish of returning back to the place you just left, whether it is a vacation site, a camp, school, or home. There is the pain of leaving friends and memories behind, the fear that they will disappear forever into the unreachable past. Usually they go away, or you learn to move on.

What if those feelings consume you?

100 Truths

Someone made me do it...

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage: Ice Cold Water
2. Last phone call: Ingold Huang
3. Last text message: Anne Cheng
4. Last song you listened to: You Alone Can Rescue
5. Last time you cried: July 9th
6. Dated someone twice: Never
7. Been cheated on: Never
8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Yes
9. Lost someone special: Yes
10. Been depressed: Yes
11. Been drunk and threw up: No

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
12: Orange
13: White
14: Forest Green

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2010)
15. Made a new friend: Yes
16. Fallen out of love: Depends on what definition of Love
17. Laughed until you cried: Lol Yes
18. Met someone who changed you: Yes
19. Found out who your true friends were: Some
20. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes
21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: No
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Most
23. How many kids do you want: 2, 1 older girl, 1 younger boy
24. Do you have any pets: yes, 1 dog
25. Do you want to change your name: Already did
26. What did you do for your last birthday: T_T
28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Extremely frustrated at my broken hard drive
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: Love
30. Last time you saw your Mother: 2 Months Ago
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: A Lot
32. What are you listening to right now: Nothing
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yes
34. Who's getting on your nerves right now: People
35. Most visited webpage: Facebook unfortunately (just checked Mozilla)
36. Whats your real name: Kuang-Pu
37. Nicknames: Pu Pu. KPLD. The Flying Pickle. Daniel-son, Daniel-San, Dan, Dan the Man, Kung Pao
38. Relationship Status: Single, Christian
39. Zodiac: Snake
40. Male or female: Male
41. Primary School: Graden Elementary School
42. Secondary School: Lakeview Middle School
43. High school/college: Park Hill South High School/ Washington University in St. Louis
44. Hair color: Black
45. Long or short: Medium for a Guy
46. Height: like 5'9
47. Do you have a crush on someone: Yes
48: What do you like about yourself: I’m humble
49. Piercings: Nope
50. Tattoos: None
51. Righty or lefty: Right-handed

FIRSTS :
52. First surgery: Shin
53. First piercing: None
54. First best friend: Daniel Yu
55. First sport you joined: Soccer
56. First vacation: US
58. First pair of trainers: 1 year-ish

RIGHT NOW:
59. Eating: Nothing
60. Drinking: Water
61. I'm about to: Answer this question
62. Listening to: Nothing
63. Waiting for: Someone to call me to go to Uncle Bills

YOUR FUTURE :
64. Want kids: Yes
65. Get married: Hopefully
66. Career: Unknown (BME: research, industry)

WHICH IS BETTER :
67. Lips or eyes: Eyes
68. Hugs or kisses: Hugs
69. Shorter or taller: Shorter
70. Older or Younger: Younger
71. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantic
72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Unimportant
73. Sensitive or loud: I can deal with both
74. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship

HAVE YOU EVER :
76. Kissed a stranger: No
77. Drank hard liquor: No
78. Lost glasses/contacts: Down the Kansas River
79. Sex on first date: No
80. Broken someone's heart: No
82. Been arrested: No
83. Turned someone down: No
84. Cried when someone died: Yes
85. Fallen For A Friend: Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself: Not enough
87. Miracles: Yes
88. Love at first sight: No
89. Heaven: Yes
90. Santa Claus: Yes
91. Kiss on the first date: No
92. Angels: Yes 

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: Never
95. Did you sing today: Yes
96. Ever cheated on somebody: No
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go: Before 4th grade
98. The moment you would choose to relive: All the past mistakes, to fix them
99. Are you afraid of falling in love: Yes, but anxiously waiting as well
100. Are you afraid of posting this as 100 truths: Yes

I discovered I am not afraid of roller coasters, though previously I thought I was. I will even go as far as to say I get bored on them, and enjoyed the screaming people next to me than the ride itself.

To be honest, I found the roller coaster ride in Despicable Me more dizzying and exhilarating.

Two Points

I find proximity is the most dangerous thing in a relationship, whether romantic or platonic. The closer the distance, the more risk of the Hedgehog Syndrome, the greater the hurt. The farther the distance, the more risk of becoming languid in the relationship or the temptation of fleeting emotions.

Communication is key. And I find communication and proximity are dependent on one another.

Epic Fails

Epic fail is when I wake up early in the morning, drag my friend out of bed to drive me to the license bureau to renew my license after my21st birthday. After driving to the front of the license bureau, I walk up to the front door, only to look and see a building completely abandoned, as if people hastily put everything onto a U-haul within an hour the day before. Finding a substitute license bureau was a hassle, and only by asking directions from a bank teller from Bank of America did my friend and I realized we have driven 3 blocks too far. The other license bureau was next to a McDonalds, where we ate after realizing the wait was about 1 hour. After waiting the 1 hour, and visiting the neighboring Rent-A-Center (which I've never been to before, very interesting place and saw all-in-one computers for the first time) I got up to the bureau worker and asked for a renewal. After taking one look at my license, she handed it back to me, and told me it expires 2011 on my birthday. I was too dumbfounded to ask if I could renew it one year early. My friend and I had many laughs of embarrassment on the way back. Oh funny day.

Epic fail is going to Central West End, parking on Maryland, and walking 4 blocks north, then 4 blocks south to get to Coffee Cartel, and then walk the same way back, only to realize that a straight path west on Maryland would have led us directly to CC (no wonder our friends, who left later than us, beat us to the location by 10 minutes). Oh, and pretending to be drunk in CWE around midnight was a blast.

Epic fail is attempting to change a flat tire, put the luge nuts on backwards, resulting in the axles getting bend and the wheel getting torn apart. I was told that I am lucky that I'm still alive, and that if I had continued to drive on the wheel, it would have fallen off and caused the car to crash.

"The power of unconditional love. I mean, there is no power on earth like unconditional love. And I think that if you offered that to your child, I mean, you’re 90 percent of the way home. There may be days when you don’t feel like it — it’s not uncritical love; that’s a different animal — but to know you can always come back, that is huge in life. That takes you a long, long way. And I would say that every parent out there that can extend that to their child at an early age, it’s going to make for a better human being." - Warren Buffet

How does a person know he or she is being used by another person?

If neither believes so, does that make it so? If I believe I am being used, then I am being used. If I don't believe so, but the other person believes so, then I'm being used. So if neither believes they are being used or using their friend, then if is a honest friendship, and not just "friends with benefits."

Are there exceptions? Absolute cases?

I do not believe all relationship are based upon using each other, despite many people I know who hold this view. Yes, I have "friends with benefits," but I also have friends who do not. Its all in your perspective. I believe there are friends who give their entire fortune, their entire dreams and goals, their life to another friend without asking anything in return, and both know it was done out of care for each other. I also believe that romantic relationships should be 100 to 0, instead of 50 to 50. Each person gives 100% of their care for the other, without expectations or asking anything in return. If both people do this, then what can separate them?

Am I being too idealistic here? Or realistic?

Dramas...I started to watch a drama again after a long time w/o watching any. Very different I would say from the typical stuff I watch. Within the first episode I remember why I do not watch TV dramas: they are too idealistic, especially for a person who desires REAL above all else.

So by episode 6 the main male protagonist is diagnosed with a brain tumor (typical), but has a male role model who also has a brain tumor and is recovering fast from it. He is recovering so fast that soon he will undergo his last bit of treatment and then proceed to get married to the love of his life. His motivational speech is obviously "do not give up" and "write your own fate." Regardless, he suddenly dies farther into the episode, dashing the dreams and hopes of the young protagonist and leaving his fiancee with only a death certificate as a reminder of his love and promises. At this part I laughed, saying, "this is too much of a lolfest to happen in real life. No one can die suddenly like that." Right after I said this, I remember a topic of another post. I does happen in real life, and I have seen it. I remember to that day, when a father was discharged from the hospital to be reunited with his family. That night my family visited their abode, congratulating them on the successful removal of his brain tumor. I myself saw him walk, stand, talk, and laugh. It was only a few hours later were we notified that he died only a little while later of hemorrhage in the brain.

I remember walking to his tombstone with his widow.

Wow, so drama can take on a realistic turn coincidentally, or is reality looking more like a drama?